Posted in Black Woman, Womanist

Purple Flames 

As dark as this world may seem, I saw something in the distance I was drawn to be intrigued. There was a fire burning in you, a bright beautiful purple flame. With everything in me I wanted to feel the warmth of your flames.

What you did not know was, I too had a fire burning in me. Something you could see but I wouldn’t allow to quite touch. 
We know that fire leads to two things- we can come together and burn the world down or we can warm even the iciest of places.

Time was our enemy but also our energy. To allow flames to grow big and bold you must allow time to take its toll . For if the flames collide to quickly they simply create combustion, while if the flames are left exposed too long without access to fulfillment they will begin to diminish.
You could see the flames in me diminish as I slowly shut down, weakening my strength, weakening my core as I became trusting, vulnerable and willing to be engulfed by your flames. Willingness to bare my soul , reveal my body and be entangled deeply into your warmth. Willing to risk my guard and my heavy calculations , simply to spend time next to a purple flame. Willing to learn your coals , be your lighter fluid and bake and bake and bake and bake as you rolled up a new one to spark in this flame . 

Unbeknownst to me… I came too close to the flame too fast. I could feel it’s heat but I got too close to fast , the wind knocking me down and instantly feeling … cold… 

Here we are… I can not see your flames, I can not feel your warmth , you are long out of my reach . But my flame has diminished . My flames have changed. The moment of vulnerability, the moment of affection and attention – over, because rejection has caused a change to this flame .

We said we could warm the world , but instead we just burned mine down. But I’d do it all over again to see the truest form of this flame wrapped in purple sheets .

-Flames

“If I seem edgy, I want you to know, I never mean to take it out on you. Life has its problems and I get more than my share… baby I am just human… don’t you know I have faults like anyone, sometimes I find myself alone regretting some little foolish thang, some simple thing that I’ve done…. “- Nina Simone

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